Abigail Adams: Remember the Ladies

Remember the ladies…especially the “saucy” ones.

”Wife of John Adams. Mother of John Quincy Adams.”

That’s what you see first when you research Abigail Adams. Every. Damn. Time. Like, to remember her is to remember her role in relation to the men of history. Those men being our “Founding Fathers.”

But here’s the hard truth: being wife of and mother of these men gave her access to the power center, to presidents, two of them. And she used it to do something unprecedented. Speak up, and not just behind the scenes, but publicly.

And without that, we wouldn’t know her at all.

So this speaking up thing she did…this was risky business at the time. Women weren’t “supposed” to be, or allowed to be, politically engaged. She wasn’t “supposed” to influence policy. She wasn’t “supposed” to challenge the men building the new government (definitely not that).

But Abigail Adams did (all of that).

She was born and raised just outside of Boston, and it shaped her. Revolution was brewing, ideas of freedom and self-governance were taking hold. But she also saw the contradictions, specifically how those same men who spoke of liberty still held power over others.

And she told them so.

In 1776, as her husband, John Adams, debated the framework of a new nation, she wrote him a letter that should have changed history:

📣 "I desire you would Remember the Ladies and be more generous and favorable to them than your ancestors. Do not put such unlimited power into the hands of the husbands. Remember, all men would be tyrants if they could.”

John’s response? He laughed. Called her “saucy”. (And I bet he slept with one eye open for at least a week after that comment).

See, “Saucy” was pointing out the cracks in the foundation before they even finished building the house. Women were already running businesses, farms, and households, holding up half of this new country. And yet, they weren’t counted.

True to these values, Abigail also spoke out in opposition to slavery. While she and John did not own slaves, some accounts portray John as “politically cautious” about abolition while in office.

But Abigail wasn’t. And that was uncomfortable, and bold.

She was outspoken as a First Lady. And we didn’t like it then, and we haven’t fully accepted it now. And that brings up an interesting question…

Would our expectations be if we flipped this? If we had a woman in the highest office, would we expect the First Gentleman to stay out of politics? To smile, to host, to remain in the background?

Maybe….? We don’t know.

Because in nearly 250 years, we haven’t had the chance to find out.

And I can’t help but wonder if Abigail had her way back in 1776, and women had been given the right to vote from the start of this great experiment, if we would know.

So this #WomensHistoryMonth, let’s remember the ladies, like Abigail.

The ones who were just a little too “saucy” for their time.

(and #VoteForWomen)